"Those three words are said too much, but not enough..."

Howdy there.

I am currently feeling very relaxed, which is down to the fact that I now only have one exam left if you leave out my oral exams. Hallelujah.
It's a bit worrying though that I only have one written exam left and I didn't actually get started revision. I'm sure my report will be full of A grades ( note the sarcasm.)

I had my french reading and "prosey wosey" today, as well as my english lit poetry exam. I think the french went fine, but then again I hadn't thought the listening had went that badly, and I ended up getting 20 out of 30, so I've probably made a shambles of this one. The prose was considerably easier than the stuff we've been doing in class. Saying that, I did have several mental blanks- I could not for the life of me remember how to say "floor" in french and I accidentally wrote the spanish word for train. Hopefully, if you squint at it, it might look like it says le train.

The english lit also went "well" as in I understood what the poem was vaguely about and I managed to write more than a paragraph. Not only that, I also had ten minutes left over at the end, which, for me, is a real novelty. I've probably read the question wrong. When I got out of the exam, I decided to check my bloodsugar out of mere curiosity, but discovered it was 2.8, so I've probably written the exam in spanish or something. Great.

After the english exam, Caters and I went to get our mobiles from Mrs Nelson, but she wasn't there, so we ended up having to stay after school, waiting for her. When we got to the buspark, we found that our bus was actually still there, but it was broken down, which isn't much use when you want to get home. We then went to get the outside bus, which is never, under any circumstances, a fun time. You either have to queue up for it with about 80 others, which was the case today, or stand in the torrential rain with a broken umbrella until about 6 o'clock because the busdriver makes a spontaneous decision not to bother his ass to come. This was also the case today.

When the bus did decide to come along and my hands, therefore, had become totally numb because of the cold, about 80 belfast highians clambered on.
When we got on, we were greeted by that familiar breathy smell that buses seem to have, which really does brighten my day, and also by the shouts of a bunch of yobbos who had placed themselves at the back of the bus where they could get a clear view of frail looking grannies to attack. It just so happens that today a pack of grammar school kids were getting on the bus i.e. a yobbo's ideal victim to mock.

As Caters and I were sitting there trying to have a conversation, a woman, sitting right in front of us, who was a bit on the chubby side, kept staring at us, which led us to feel a bit paranoid. Whilst trying to figure out why this woman continued to turn round and stare at us at regular intervals, we tried to have
a conversation, but were interrupted by the sounds of the chavs, chanting their usual- and what seems to them as hilarious- "eyoooooooo". Well, dear chavs, if I could give you one piece of advice, it would be this: there is nothing funny nor witty about shouting "eyoooooo" at people. In fact, it just shows a lack of vocabulary, articulation and, contrary to your belief, looks highly uncool.

After sitting there for a while, we came to a conclusion that the chubby woman in front of us appeared to know "Carl" and his bling-covered mates. As the chavs threw bits of scrunched up paper at her hair whilst having conversations about when to smoke their next joint, brave chubby woman retaliated by saying " I'm watching you" and proceeded to give them- what she thought was- a look of death. There was no beating Carl and Crew, however, because they replied with what is perhaps the wittiest, most intelligent insult of the century : " shut yer bake, there's sheeeeeiiiiite in yer knickers." Well done guys. I'm sure that'll be in the Guinness Book of records for the sharpest comeback ever made.

Not only did anonymous chubby woman take a psycho at Carl and crew( who were presumably named Steeky, DJ, Soupy, Tyler or some other highly original chavtastic name), she also shouted the bus down when she realised there was an accident on the station round, making all of think she had seen a horrific sight. But oh no. Anonymous chubby woman feels that seeing a car crashed into a tree makes it feasible to scream " OH MYYY GAWWWD. OHHHHHH MYYYYY GAWWWWD" all over the bus, at least 70 times.

Then, as an anonymous chav was getting off the bus, Carl thought he'd use the opportunity of saying goodbye to his friend to demonstrate his impressive linguistic ability. And So he yelled at the top of his voice that well known spanish phrase: "Hasta la vasta". Nice try, Carl.


People like that make me embarrassed to say I'm northern irish.